The Medical Research Council (MRC) in SA published shocking findings after research conducted amongst a representative sample of men in south africa. the research was done in the Eastern Cape (where I live) and also in Kwazulu Natal (where i used to live).
The results suggest that 1 in 4 men surveyed admitted to having raped a woman.
(you can read an article about the findings here: Mail & Guardian article)
I sat stunned as I read. I’ve always heard statistics about rape and violence against women in south African society, but this statistic left me reeling. What is wrong with us? What is wrong with masculinity? Even old-fashioned ideas about maleness suggests it’s the mens role to “protect” the so-called weaker sex. What kind of protection are we offering?
I am not in the 1 in 4 category. I have not raped a woman. Which puts me in the 3 in 4 group… But there’s no comfort in being in that group for me. I’m asking myself, what have we 3 done to make it possible for the 1 in4 to do what they have done?
How have we colluded with questionable ideas about being “men”?
How have we failed to speak out against attitudes and actions that are not respectful of women?
How have we failed to act - holding our fellow men accountable for their actions?
How can it be that 1 in 4 men have raped a women, and the other 3 know nothing about it? What is our (what is my) responsibility?
I keep asking myself what am I going to do?
- I’m calling men to kneel with me. Not to show their “might” but to humble themselves and show their heart!
- I’m going to organise a meeting where men can listen to the experiences of women through the eyes of a person working with rape victims every day.
- I’m going to prepare a talk entitled “why I am a feminist.” and present it before National Women’s Day in August.
But these things are not enough. the threat to women is too great to simply talk about it.
Pray tell me, what can we do?
[Click on picture to view enlarged version]