seethrough

i’ve been feeling tired in my soul over the past week.  one afternoon i got home and just crawled into bed.  not really fair on my family.  wife has been sick and children have been demanding.  and yet the weariness i felt was overwhelming.

i don’t usually look for reasons for these kinds of things.  mostly i’ve just ignored my body (and maybe my soul) and expected myself to “get over it”.  but i am learning to be kind to myself.  so I wondered, “what’s the significance of this feeling?”  and even,  “is there a significanc?”

Then a thought popped into my head.  It’s nearly the anniversary of a painful experience in my life that marked the beginning of the end of my marriage.  It’ll be 7 years next week that the marriage that I took so for granted began to crumble.  Sure, it had been crumbling before that, but i wouldn’t face that reality.  But in February 2002 the reality came crashing down as my ex-wife began to make her need for freedom and independence known…

But the main reason for this reflection is not actually that history.  the thing i’ve been wondering about since that thought popped into my head is, how do I know that that’s the right “diagnosis”?  Is this “anniversary” the cause of my tiredness?  or is it some other thing?

I also began to think about how people often explain to me the significance of events and experiences in their lives.  They often speak with great certainty about the meaning and significance of events and experiences.  But what if these are just meanings and significances that we give - because we need explanations.  We want explanations.

We need a diagnosis!

I think there are probably many reasons I’m feeling tired.  A big factor is probably the weight of responsibility I carry.  I’m not blaming anyone.  I choose to accept that weight.  Then there’s the way i work.  and my neglect of night-time rest.  I also haven’t been writing and doing some of these life-giving things that inspire and energise me.  I’m not actually sure that the “anniversary” link is such a big factor.  I just don’t think I’m that sentimental to still be affected by the memory.

But I have enjoyed thinking about the concept of diagnosis: the process by which we decide “what’s wrong”.  and the resulting search for a plausible and acceptable explanation.  I think we choose to give event and experiences in our lives significance and meaning.  It’s something we all do and will always need to do.  These are the stories (and THE story) that will be told about our lives.

but my caution comes from the realisation that it could be easy for ONE explanation, or “meaning” to take hold of us - to dominate our reflection - thus not allowing other possible interpretations, meanings and connections to be made.

I would suggest that if prayer and reflection be our spiritual practices, then they always include time to reflect and pray on how we have chosen to signify, interpret and tell the story of our days…

a diagnosis often helps a lot.  after a long search, an explanation can be of great relief.  But i’m thinking that a diagnosis can also be dangerous…

• when it claims to have the singular explanation for a “problem” (as if there is only ONE factor or cause behind the complex experiences of our lives) and
• when  it makes us passive and closed to other possible meanings, explanations and significances which may be real, but overlooked, because we’ve “got” our diagnosis

may you be - increasingly - well!

i stumbled on a thought while reading Rob Bell - Velvet Elvis.  in a section entitled “yoke” he speaks about his conviction that the bible didn’t fall out of the sky.  he begs “us” to once and for all drop the “manual-for-life” analogy and recognise that the bible was written in a real time, in a real place, and by real people.

i like what  he’s saying.

that’s when i stumbled onto the thought…  we (in the christian community, usually called the church) struggle to get people to do the application part of the deal.  we’re good at talking.  our theology (read theory) is awe-inspiring in it’s comprehensive coverage of all things pertaining to the life of a christ-follower.  doctoral theses have been written about things that even Jesus doesn’t understand.  (in fact I think Jesus struggles to remember the correct spelling for ecclesiology, but anyway…)  as I was saying awe-inspiring theory.

but when it comes to application - to the integration of our theory into our lives - we often fall short.

could it be that the growing (and commonly held) perception that the bible is somehow a mysterious and magical book of timeless truths that just dropped out of the sky (i.e. NOT originating from real places, real times and real people) is actually at the heart of this problem with integrating biblical truth with everyday living?

i agree with Rob Bell that what makes the Bible valuable, significant and quite unique is that it records the stories of people seeking to live out their faith in the midst of the challenges of their particular times, circumstances.  Perhaps more importantly it also records the personal challenges of individuals in their journeys of faith - investigating their very particular and personal challenges - from anger and murder to sexual brokenness and adultery, from failure and faithlessness to weakness and hopelessness.

what may help people to marry theory and practice - biblical teaching and faithful living - is approaching the Bible with a fresh openness - trusting that it’s greatest gift is that it records the stories of faith honestly - fear and failure, hope and triumph.  But always - it’s a story about application.  It’s always about making faith work in everyday circumstances!!!

we need real faith for real life.  and we need to read the Bible in a way that encourages rubber meeting road.

when last did you use the phrase “reading between the lines”. it commonly refers certain unspoken assumptions or special knowledges that are not referred to explicitly in the text. reading between the lines is then the “art” of interpreting a text based not only on what has been said but also on what has not been said.

it seems to me that what has not been said can sometimes prove more significant than what has actually been said. one of the effects of not saying things is that it excludes certain listeners. for instance, if certain specialised knowledges are taken as read by a speaker or writer, then only those who are familiar with those knowledges will easily be able to access the message. this is one of the ways that knowledge and power work together - to the extent that philosopher Michel Foucault chose to refer to them as a single entity, referring to “knowledge/power” in some of his writings.

when “subtext” is used to consciously exclude people i believe that this is unethical use of knowledge/power. but it is probably much more common - in everyday communication - that subtext plays a role without any malicious or prejudicial intent. subtext refers to anything that is not said in a communication, that is still playing a part in that communication. even if that subtext be unconscious or unknown to the speaker or writer!

what will help us to speak (and to write) with greater clarity and simplicity?

but sub-text is not always bad. humour is often very reliant on the subtext of a conversation. the humour is reliant on not everything being said.

the other interesting thought in this regard is the perspective of postmodern philosophers who are inclined to return to the text. for instance, in the area of psychology, postmodern practitioners are critical of a previous tendency to privilege subtext over the actual words and perspective of the client. according to their critique, psychology became overly focused on the privileged and specialised ability to interpret the subtext of a person’s life. some recent writing encourages a return to the surface (as it were) - a renewed focus on the actual words that are spoken (and chosen) by the client in a therapeutic conversation. This perspective discourages delving into reflections on subtext.

interesting alternative views - perhaps we need to acknowledge the subtle role of subtext in communication while at the same time, being careful not to discount the importance of the actual words that people have chosen to use when seeking to communicate something…

henry is “critical but stable”. over the next few weeks i will probably spend some time paying tribute to this remarkable man. if he survives this ordeal I will still be glad to have said these things… I often think we wait too long before we pay tribute to people we love and/or respect…

I have enjoyed my lessons in Narrative Therapy and Counselling. I am not an expert - well, as Narrative practitioners will tell you “the client is the expert” - but I mean that I do not consider myself to have mastered the art of working with the stories and streams of people’s lives in the creative and helpful way that some are able to…  I am constantly challenged by this way of working - and inspired by watching and speaking with people who are more masterful than i.

a (the?) big challenge for a Narrative Therapist is to assist a person to tell the forgotten or neglected (but valued and hopeful) stories of a person’ life. Another way of talking about this is to listen for the Silenced Voices, the marginalised voices in your life.

Certain very Dominant Voices and Stories have a way of taking over a person’s life and trying to strangle and subdue other opposing stories and voices that are not so forceful or well-established. For instance, I may have grown up as a sensitive boy who was able to feel compassion easily and cried often. A Dominant Story of male strength and bravery might come along and subdue the story of sensitivity and compassion, encouraging me to embrace a very different way of being, not necessarily because I really want to, but perhaps for other reasons, like not wanting to be rejected or embarrassed by peers…

The good news is that these subdued voices/stories don’t seem to die. they hide. Sometimes they are hard to find again. but they are there. and with gentle encouragement, they often make a wonderful reappearance offering us new choices for our lives and our futures.

Henry Botha, elaine’s father, had a difficult upbringing. his family was poor and life was hard. He has worked hard and made a life for himself and for his family, who he loves in very practical ways. In some ways, the fear of his past (poverty, i think) has haunted him and made him quite driven in his work. But the thing that I find so commendable is his sensitivity to the underdog. he has never (it seems) forgotten the humble beginnings - where he came from. Henry has an incorrigible love of the underdog. he goes out of his way to help a person who is working hard, but struggling. I think Henry has an ability to see an “underdog” much quicker than the rest of us. He possesses a great sensitivity when it comes to people who are struggling. Even across the racial barrier, Henry is often quietly but generously helping people without seeking recognition.

I have spent so much time trying to learn the theory of sensitivity to the Voice of the Marginalised but tonight I pay tribute to a great man who is so powerfully conscious of the small people, the lowly people… a great quality!

a few weeks go I wrote about “another story” - referring to a rediscovery of the old story of biblical faith, that has been sadly domesticated and diminished.

I gave 5 pointers as to what I think will help us rediscover the other story that has been lost. One of the things I suggested was this:

surely it must work out a new motivation for Faith. If we aren’t following Jesus to “avoid hell and earn our ticket into heaven”, what will be our primary reason for following?

Let me expand a little on what I mean by this…

Consider that favourite old verse of bible-believers… John 3:16 - “For God so loved the World…” The World!!! There it is in black-and-white -right under our noses. The Gospel of Sin-management (Dallas Willard, which reduces the Gospel into the forgiveness of sins so that you can gain access into heaven) fails to acknowledge the broad and all-encompassing goals of biblical salvation. Salvation can’t just be about my sins being forgiven! Besides it being contrary to the broad vision of scriptural prophecy (consider Isaiah’s vision of the Lion lying down with the Lamb… and sickles and ploughshares…) - it fails the simple test of selfishness: it’s just downright self-centred to tell God’s story of salvation in terms of the forgiveness or MY sins.

(more…)

(Aiden remarked, when reading another story that he “looked forward to turning the page”… so, with his encouragement, here is page 2…)

did you know that the Hebrew and Christian Scriptures use the phrases “do not fear” and “do not be afraid” 113 times!!! (those same scriptures use the phrase “love God” only 5 times…) So let’s make a humble assumption - spirituality that takes the Bible (meaning the Hebrew and Christian scriptures) seriously will be a spirituality that is Peace-producing. Essentially, I’m assuming that Biblical Spirituality will echo this sentiment - do not fear, do not be afraid, do not worry, etc.

the Christian scriptures tell us that Jesus is the “prince of peace” (i’m assuming that means that if anyone is going to bring peace it will be him..) it also tells us that “perfect love casts out all fear” (1 John 4:18) and goes on to make a clear observation: “for fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not reached perfection in love.”

the thing that I struggle with is that the “good news” that many Christians offer is highly fearful. The common story goes something like this: God created you. Things were good until you messed up. You sinned and God was angry. You had broken his Law. Justice was required so someone had to die. It would have been you (and it might still be if you don’t…) but Jesus died in your place to “absorb the wrath of God” (John Piper). To return to right relationship with God, you must repent and believe (presumably that Jesus died for you) so that eternal punishment can be avoided. If you do, God’s anger is avoided and heaven awaits. If you don’t, the just punishment for your sins will be your reward - that’s hell. (If “God is Love” he certainly has a big investment in fear and punishment in the universe…)

so here’s a question: what motivates your faith in God? why are you a Christian? is it to avoid the fires of hell - an eternal punishment? as I’ve indicated here i am an unapologetic follower of Jesus. I am willing to associate myself with him in every way. but I am simply not happy to associate myself with this common version of the Christian Story any longer. I think that there is another story which is desperately needing to be told - needing to be heard.

(some quick reasons why the new story needs to be heard:
1. i don’t think that the common version is doing our Great God of Grace justice!
2. many good, thinking, moral, faithful, did i mention good, people are simply not able to fathom a God who is so petty and, instead of looking deeper into the faith tradition, are choosing to live as moral atheists rather than associate with such a paper-thin version of a Creator God.
3. it is Fear Producing - which is exactly the opposite of what Biblical faith is supposed to do. Where is the peace? Where is the confidence?)

Here’s to another story! (I don’t call it a new story because I would like to argue that this other story has been around longer than the common one!!! it’s the old story, needing rediscovery)

my understanding of Jesus was that he chose to live and teach in the tradition of the Hebrew prophetic tradition - most significantly, the prophetic vision of Isaiah. His first public teaching in a synagogue involved a reading from Isaiah 61 (Luke 4:16) - a moving, inspiring vision about the “Year of the Lord’s favour”. (the interesting thing is that the phrase “and a day of vengeance for our God” - Is 61:2 - is omitted in Luke) This prophetic tradition includes moving passages about the coming of the Messiah who will bring peace - when the Lion will lie down with the Lamb (Isaiah 11)… perhaps the most moving passage for me is found in Isaiah chapter 2:

Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord,
to the house of the God of Jacob;
that he may teach us his ways
and that we may walk in his paths.’
For out of Zion shall go forth instruction,
and the word of the Lord from Jerusalem.
He shall judge between the nations,
and shall arbitrate for many peoples;
they shall beat their swords into ploughshares,
and their spears into pruning-hooks;
nation shall not lift up sword against nation,
neither shall they learn war any more.

These are the passages that I believe inform the ministry of Jesus. When he speaks about the “Kingdom of Heaven”, I believe he is talking about this kind of Kin’dom… where Peace is found to be stronger than force, where love is eternal and cannot die…

In the light of these (biblical) observations, I want to encourage those who are dissatisfied with the common story to begin to consider Alternatives. I believe there are many other stories on offer in the Christian Scriptures. Paul’s writings do contain much that supports the common version, but he also transcends those thoughts in some of his writings, focusing more on the theme of Reconciliation. See 2 Corinthians 5:16-21. (I realise that it is possible to use this passage to underscore the common version of Christianity.) I believe it is possible to interpret this passage in a way that appeals to Loving Relationship as a motivation for Faith… (perhaps the topic of Page 3…) The Gospels are the best place to look though, because the parables and the ministry of Jesus are still being processed by the authors. The Gospel writers certainly include their own interpretations in the re-telling of the stories (which explains some of the differences in the four gospels) but the interpretation can be said to be “in process”. This gives us a glimpse into the early Christian community of people who were not called “Christians” - they were simply people of faith who had decided to follow the teachings of Jesus. They were best described as “those belonging to the Way” (acts 9:2)

What are some of the attributes that I think Another Story might include?
1. i think it must choose to be faithful to the teaching and example of Jesus. this might involve a revisiting of the gospels and a decision to take Jesus at his word. or as Albert Nolan says to “take Jesus seriously”.
2. surely it must work out a new motivation for Faith. If we aren’t following Jesus to “avoid hell and earn our ticket into heaven”, what will be our primary reason for following? it might return to a much more wholistic understanding of the word “believe” which embraces the whole self, heart, will, mind, body, in place of a modern understanding of the word which reduces believing to mental (intellectual?) agreement. To say “I believe in Jesus” would be more akin to saying “I commit my whole self to Jesus”.
3. it must strive to be all-embracing, not sectarian but able to embrace variety so that it can become a story of Peace and Unity. surely if God’s Kin’dom is going to be eternal we’re going to have to live side-by-side then… why not start finding a way to live together now…?
4. it might formulate a different understanding of authority. for instance, it may choose to view the Spirit of scripture as a higher authority than the historical written text. This might include the recognition that not everything that is biblical is consistent with the teaching of Jesus i.e. Christian
5. Another Story might re-emphasize the importance of being good - what Jesus meant when he spoke about the fruit that a tree bears. the Common Story has used the Fear of God (of hell) to motivate people into believing, and has unwittingly encouraged people to “believe” at all costs, but has paid too little attention on the thing that Jesus asked us to do: “go and make disciples” (Matthew 28) disciples are learners, and presumably that means learners of The Way. Evidencing the Fruit of the Spirit - the signs of a transforming life - will become the essence of Another Story.

What do you think might be some of the attributes of Another Story? OR, what would you LIKE to see being addressed by a different kind of Spirituality? (that you feel has been neglected by the Common Version of Christianity in your experience?)

i’ve been taking some strain lately for wanting to live and speak from the heart.

all ministers in the denomination that I belong to have been trained in theology and biblical studies. being able to do theology (which I define as talk about God) and interpret scripture are basic skills of a pastor and teacher. the approach to these skills is not legislated. there are a variety of different perspectives that emerge from our training programme. it isn’t a sausage-machine producing exact replicas of the trainers…

But one thing I assume is that the process of education has encouraged us all to think and wrestle with theological and biblical issues. To some extent, I expect a colleague to be able to engage with the complex and sometimes difficult issues surrounding a pastoral concern that they might face. on the whole, I would say that my colleagues seems to reflect this. I feel safe to speak about my theological questions and struggles with most colleagues and i don’t expect them to answer “oh, but that’s an easy one - in mark 9v7 it says…”

why, oh why then do we as pastors and teachers not share these views of theology and scripture with our congregations? why do I find ordinary members of congregations SO soaked in a foreign legalistic theology and literalistic approach to scripture? It seems that the proponents of such views have been far more dedicated to communicating their views and also more effective in convincing people that they are the authority.

We now find ourselves in a situation where the spirituality of many ordinary members of churches is defined not primarily by their local pastor, but by the writings and on-screen persona of some “higher” authority. I don’t expect to hear anyone on CTV or TBN proposing that we encourage faithful same-sex couples to enter the bonds of covenant relationship out of devotion to Christ. It seems that the conservative theological agenda perspective has spoken often and loudly and now dominates the church - even churches like my own that do not have a conservative theological or literalistic scriptural tradition!

This week I had breakfast with three people. I was encouraged by the conversation. I know them all as people who seek to love God and grow toward wholeness their lives. The conversation focussed on how the church can continue to offer nourishment to those who are looking for thoughtfulness and depth alongside passion and experience. I think that integrity was also a value that featured highly in the conversation. It was very encouraging for me to be a participant in the conversation and I found it strengthening my confidence that there is another story of faith that is quieter and more gentle, but no less devoted to God and no less serious about scripture - just perhaps a little more cautious about certainty and more devoted to wholeness and freedom from fear.